Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Game #3 Florida at Las Vegas

So I'm giving this another try.

I couldn't watch game #2 on TV since I don't get HDNet (Sorry Mark Cuban blame Time Warner not me) I tried watching it for a few minutes online, but that's no why to watch a minor league football game.

So here we are Week #2, Game #3 and things are already looking up:
  • For the most part, the teams are wearing visually discernable jerseys
  • Neither coach is wearing a Men's Wearhouse "fat guy" shirt
  • Mike Simms is correctly pronouncing JP Losman's (Loss-man) name.

But its Wednesday night and I'm watching pro football so it can't all be bad. And I better learn to like this league because odds are that the best football we will have in Buffalo in 3 years will be from an FL that doesn't begin with N.

9:21 PM Holy Schnikes!!! The endzone markers are Orange and no longer Lime Green. Good move Commish. I'll take some credit for that change, but I give you credit for doing it.

9:26 Nice call Mike Simms (Loss-man) and BTW damn you JP. You know who could have caught a ball like you throw--TO.

9:45 Make that the Youtube-FL

10:05 JP Losman is still horrible, but I'm still watching and I'm enjoying this game. The overall quality of play is good. But I watch the Bills play on a weekly basis.

10:07 Final thoughts of the night. Anita Marks still needs some work, but what the UFL really needs is innovation--some small twist that enhances the game that they can call their own. The XFL brought the overhead huddle/Madden cam to TV for the first time and it was so good the NFL stole it. They also brought nicknames to the backs of jerseys--and face it who didn't love HE HATE ME. Some of their innovations like the collarbone crushing "face-off" for the football in lieu of the coin toss didn't work, but they tried. Give me that ownable aspect that I can only get watching UFL football and you've got me hooked.

More next Versus televised game...

Thursday, October 8, 2009

UFL Game #1 Las Vegas and California

With the 1st Qtr of the UFL in the books, here are 10 things about the UFL that I find problematic to downright offensive:

  • They are playing in a 98% empty stadium
  • All the team’s uniforms and helmets use the same 4-color color palate. It sounds novel and someone probably thought they were very cute when they came up with this-- but makes it really hard to tell the teams apart on the field. The longer this game goes on, the more I hate neon green, and neon blue.
  • The first down yellow line occasionally goes diagonally across the field
  • The sideline reporters are in a constant state of confusion
  • JP Losman is the league’s premier play and he also is in a constant state of confusion. He is a spaz.
  • They keep calling JP Losman-- JP Loews-man. Its freakin Loss-man people. Its very easy to remember. JP puts the Loss in Loss-man. BTW he is a fine garbage picker—Las Vegas should consider themselves lucky (assuming he keeps his starting job, because no starting job=no community service for JP)
  • The side judges and umpires make it look like a collection of renegade Tiger Woods clones have descended onto the field
  • They still air Brett Favre Wrangler commercials
  • The coaches all wear classic “fat old guy” shirts. Even worse Men’s Wearhouse™ pays actual US money to sponsor their outfits (and they sponsor field goals-YAK)
  • There are way too many former Buffalo Bills in this league. Could be a solid indication why the Bills haven’t made the playoffs in 9 years.
Mid-2nd Quarter Observations:
  • There is a distinct reason that first down markers, sideline yardmarkers and endzone markers are ORANGE and NOT GREEN at every other level of professional football. ITS BECAUSE THE FREAKING FIELD IS GREEN AND YOU CAN'T SEE SMALL GREEN MARKERS ON A GIANT GREEN FOOTBALL FIELD. Another case of someone being too cute for their own good.
  • They said they have mic'd Centers, Refs and Coaches, but I've yet to hear anything.
  • Kordell Stewart and Anita Marks promised me interviews as soon as a player scores a touchdown. I see a touchdown, but no interview. Have those two been fired already? If so, I'd understand.
  • It seems their biggest innovation is allowing (errrrrrrrrrrrrrr forcing) touchdown celebrations
OK now I'm really piling on...
  • They have an official UFL water and it is "alkaline water" like alkaline batteries. No thanks.
  • NOW WAIT A DAMN MINUTE--Their Commissioner just said there are 15,000 people there. Maybe 1,500.
  • And then Flutie asks their Commish: "Where did you learn your corner cutting methods" Nothing and I mean NOTHING means quality, value, and destined for success like Corner Cutting.
Wow, that Luvale Sape (another Bills draft pick that the UFL people are pronouncing his name completely differently than I've ever heard it) report from Anita Marks was the worst sideline report of all time. Paraphrasing (but not that much): He hurt his ankle, but he's from Samoa so his teammates made a Tsunami collection for him, but his family is fine, but they lost everything AND his ankle is hurt.

Fassell tells JP how to throw the football. Good to know.

Oh good, they still found a way to fit a pink ribbon on their already atrocious uniforms.

Flutie goes through some new-fangled UFL fumble rule. Refs ignore it. They just want to go home too.

Speaking of Dee Dee Dorsey. Isn't "Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia" on right now. Yes it is. Sorry UFL I've seen enough.